Avatar drains a three...

Watching the Avatar Promo...I mean, NBA Playoffs, is consuming my entire Sunday. Usually on Sundays I like to sleep in till 1pm, compare coffee in my neighborhood (Pizza by The Park..excellent...Xinags Deli...taste like burnt hair) and pretend I have a wife by yelling "Ill be back later, get off my back" every time I leave the house. But today, when all is said and done, I will have watched 4 games, 12 hours of basketball. The turn around from my teens to now is amazing. I wasn't into sports at all in high school. In soccer, my position was the one where you kick the ball between the orange cones on the sideline. I played baseball to get the pizza party afterwards. My dad would yell at me when I asked who he was voting for in the game, or if he liked the other players costumes. But now, I'm sports obsessed. Except for hockey. Its just..soo....Canadien. Even FOX knew it was boring a few years ago when they made the puck glow so you could follow it. And FOX had the PJ'S! SO they know boring.

Nothing but net. This is why fish don't like basketball...(that joke is for my 5 year old fans)

This week, I performed in Aurora New York. A college town where there are 550 students, one bar, one supermarket, and countless cows. the cows loved us. The show was great, and makes me wonder what would have happened if I went to college. What happened, what distracted me from the college path...oh, Extreme Makeover Home Edition is on!

I also did a show Friday in Baton Rogue. The Red Stick. Muggy, hot, and overcast. And that was the women! Ha ha ha..oh..save it for the show in Modesto Rory.

Hope everyone had a great 4 20 ...I did. From what I remember I did...pizza was consumed, songs were sung, and dreams were fulfilled. Memory loss? probably, but totally worth it.

Hope everyone had a great 4 20...

Most of life is like a Yo-Yo...some things leave and come back and leave again, or is that a boomerang, or is that Martin Lawrence. I can never remember.

"It's the apocalypse alright! I always knew I'd have a hand in it."
- Professer Farnsworth, Futurama

I didn't give an old lady my seat on the train a few weeks ago. I asked a guy who obviously whitened his teeth if he would smile at the sidewalk so I could find my contact lens. I was given change for a twenty instead of the ten I gave for coffee and for a moment thought about not saying anything. So, maybe it was fate, karma, or wrong place right time for the mugging to happen. When the guy grabbed my bag (yes, I'm an 80 year old woman) I ran after him. So at least I know my natural reaction is not to scream like a 10 year old girl who saw the Jonas Brothers sex tape, but instead to blindly run in the face of danger. The 8 drinks in me didn't hurt either

Making ends meet is getting harder and harder because there seem to be new ends every day. And how many times must ends meet? It seems like some ends have Alzheimer's and need to meet every month. Doesn't any end know each other anymore? What a world.

I haven't had a phone for 24 hours...I feel naked. That and I have no clothes on...but the people at this Starbucks don't seem to mind...

I'm so glad baseball season is back. Theres a game on every day at almost every time, so theres never a bad reason to be in a bar. Unless that bar is Applebees. Then theres never a good reason for that.

I owe the IRS a tidy sum of money. I guess that's why my initials are in there...

If April Showers really bring May Flowers, then these should be some BIG ASS Flowers coming my way. I'm going to lay down...hopefully to dream of a more innocent time...like 26 hours ago.

"The status quo sucks" - George Carlin